Social networks messing up relationships is something we often hear about, but how much should a social network really affect your relationship? In my opinion it shouldn't at all, but that's just me. Twitter& Facebook are the main two social networks people use these days, so this time I'll attempt to use logic to break down relationship issues with Twitter.
"Twitter"
Now everyone knows that little blue bird has caused trouble for a majority of people, but what else can you expect from a bird. Birds are annoying, loud, plus they never shut up but as guys we may keep them around for entertainment purposes because they may look good. That "Twitter" bird is no different from a bird from the hood. The “Twitter” bird is your typical hood Brownsville chick that thinks she's sophisticated since she wears black dresses & moved to Bay Ridge or something. If you don't know how to operate under the"Lurk Laws", you will be another casualty to that little loud mouth bird.
Lurk - 1 a : to lie in wait in a place of concealment especially for an evil purpose
b : to move furtively or inconspicuously
c : to persist in staying
2 a : to be concealed but capable of being discovered; specifically : toconstitute a latent threat
b : to lie hidden
3 : to read messages on an Internet discussion forum (as a newsgroup or chatroom) without contributing
I won't be discussing the "Lurk Laws", the "Drop", the"Reverse Lurk" or any of its ancient teachings, because those are jewels that got me this far in life & are dear to my heart so I only share them with close friends in need or for 3 easy payments of $19.99.
Trust me when I say all females maneuver & lurk with precision, which makes it difficult for the typical guy to flourish in a trouble free twitter experience. Sadly there are still a lot of gullible, naive & stupid guys who don't believe this & they have no knowledge of the "Lurk" in 2011, so it may be too late for you guys. If your lady or shorty has knowledge of activities you're about to partake in before you even notified her you just fell victim to the infamous "Lurk". Your lady will read your tweets, the tweets of 3-4 dudes she knows that you chill with, and the tweets of the most frequented females you communicate with. I know what people are going to say, "The best way to not get mad or keep your relationship out of trouble is by not following your significant other, right!?". Wrong, you can"Unfollow" or even "Block" your lady, that will only bring up trust arguments & guess what she's still going to know what you're tweeting regardless. Your lady won't tell you but she's trained in the secret art of "Lurk-Fu", and can combat EVERYTHING you throw at her in a deadly fashion. She'll still know what your entire timeline looks like, because if she can't "Follow" your tweets she has a few trained assassins willing to disguise themselves & do it for her. Those assassins your lady has in her arsenal are known as something I think females call "Friends" or "Home Girls". Trust & believe that she has a friend or two that you don't know too much about, and that trained assassin of a friend will be more than glad to watch your tweets for her. Some guys even fall victim to the "She doesn't really use Twitter like that" swindle, I wish those guys a happy life. There are a large amount of females who "Don't use Twitter like that", or find it "Boring" until the guy that they're interested in "Uses Twitter like that". Your lady doesn't have to tweet in order to keep her "Twitter" active, just because she isn't tweeting doesn't mean she isn't reading. Once you realize "Twitter" is a courtroom, and everything you tweet or retweet will be used against you in the "Court of Her",you'll be better off.
"Twitter"
Now everyone knows that little blue bird has caused trouble for a majority of people, but what else can you expect from a bird. Birds are annoying, loud, plus they never shut up but as guys we may keep them around for entertainment purposes because they may look good. That "Twitter" bird is no different from a bird from the hood. The “Twitter” bird is your typical hood Brownsville chick that thinks she's sophisticated since she wears black dresses & moved to Bay Ridge or something. If you don't know how to operate under the"Lurk Laws", you will be another casualty to that little loud mouth bird.
Lurk - 1 a : to lie in wait in a place of concealment especially for an evil purpose
b : to move furtively or inconspicuously
c : to persist in staying
2 a : to be concealed but capable of being discovered; specifically : toconstitute a latent threat
b : to lie hidden
3 : to read messages on an Internet discussion forum (as a newsgroup or chatroom) without contributing
I won't be discussing the "Lurk Laws", the "Drop", the"Reverse Lurk" or any of its ancient teachings, because those are jewels that got me this far in life & are dear to my heart so I only share them with close friends in need or for 3 easy payments of $19.99.
Trust me when I say all females maneuver & lurk with precision, which makes it difficult for the typical guy to flourish in a trouble free twitter experience. Sadly there are still a lot of gullible, naive & stupid guys who don't believe this & they have no knowledge of the "Lurk" in 2011, so it may be too late for you guys. If your lady or shorty has knowledge of activities you're about to partake in before you even notified her you just fell victim to the infamous "Lurk". Your lady will read your tweets, the tweets of 3-4 dudes she knows that you chill with, and the tweets of the most frequented females you communicate with. I know what people are going to say, "The best way to not get mad or keep your relationship out of trouble is by not following your significant other, right!?". Wrong, you can"Unfollow" or even "Block" your lady, that will only bring up trust arguments & guess what she's still going to know what you're tweeting regardless. Your lady won't tell you but she's trained in the secret art of "Lurk-Fu", and can combat EVERYTHING you throw at her in a deadly fashion. She'll still know what your entire timeline looks like, because if she can't "Follow" your tweets she has a few trained assassins willing to disguise themselves & do it for her. Those assassins your lady has in her arsenal are known as something I think females call "Friends" or "Home Girls". Trust & believe that she has a friend or two that you don't know too much about, and that trained assassin of a friend will be more than glad to watch your tweets for her. Some guys even fall victim to the "She doesn't really use Twitter like that" swindle, I wish those guys a happy life. There are a large amount of females who "Don't use Twitter like that", or find it "Boring" until the guy that they're interested in "Uses Twitter like that". Your lady doesn't have to tweet in order to keep her "Twitter" active, just because she isn't tweeting doesn't mean she isn't reading. Once you realize "Twitter" is a courtroom, and everything you tweet or retweet will be used against you in the "Court of Her",you'll be better off.
- If you're in a relationship, both you & your significant other know what y'all should & shouldn't be tweeting. Twitter shouldn't be the reason why your relationship was destroyed or isn't working.
- Once you're taking someone seriously, there are certain "Mentions" & "DM's" you just CAN'T respond too.
- Neither of you need to be tweeting about any and every argument y'all had/have.
- There are ZERO reasons why y'all should be arguing on Twitter. You'll both look stupid.
- You can't really control who mentions you or your significant other, but both of you can let people know not to cross certain lines of respect.
- You can't want people to stay out of your business if you put it all over the INNANET. Yes, I said Innanet.
- Every woman studied the dark arts, which means your lady knows magic. If you don't believe me, watch how she has the ability to turn anything into an argument.
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